Superheroes, Halloween, and the Color Red
by Fallen Ark Angel
Summary: Comparing Marvel to DC is like comparing Fang to Iggy. Seriously. There's only one winner. - Post-Nevermore, one-shot.


Superheroes, Halloween, and the Color Red

"I think I'd be a totally hot superhero."

I blinked. Then I sighed. Next I closed my eyes.

"Iggy, is there a reason that you're bothering me during my lunch break or-"

"Max, Gasman and I sought you out for a very important reason. I'm almost insulted that-"

"Get to the point, Iggy," Fang grunted out from his spot next to me. He had spent the day building things around the island and wanted our break to be spent together. Not with the Eyeless Wonder…was that mean? I feel like that was mean. God, I'm glad I didn't say that aloud.

"Right." He crossed his arms over his chest then, standing there before me as I sat with my back against a palm tree. Gasman was next to him, looking rather nervous. Hope they don't want anything serious. I just hate telling them no…which I would be doing.

Most certainly.

"So I wanted you guys to come to the Halloween party with me as a group costume."

I blinked. Then I sighed. "Iggy, what Halloween party?"

"Uh, Max, _the_ Halloween party."

Glancing at Fang, I asked, "You hear about this?"

"Nope."

Looking back at Iggy, I said, "Then it doesn't exist."

"Max," Gasman whined then. "You have to come to the Halloween party with us."

"Why do I-"

"Did you miss the part of the group costume thing?" Iggy asked. "I need a chick. And you're a chick…sort of."

"Iggy-"

"And we get along…sort of."

"You really-"

"And you'd fit in the costume…sort of."

"I-"

"It's just that your breasts aren't big enough."

"Alright, that's enough." Fang jumped up then, dropping his apple to the sand at his feet. "What the heck is wrong with you?"

Iggy couldn't see Fang, but he didn't need to. He knew he was angry and took a step back. "Easy now. I just need Max to be, you know, Black Widow."

"What?" I asked with a frown. "I don't wanna be a spider. Who would want to be-"

"Why would Max be-"

"'cause, Fang, we're going to be the Avengers!" Gasman was excited then, of course, and bounced slightly. "I'm gonna be the Hulk and Iggy's going to be Iron Man and you can be-"

"Wasp," Fang said without thinking. I glanced up at him before sighing and getting to my feet too. There went my happy lunch break. "I want to be the Wasp."

"What the hell is the Wasp?" Iggy frowned. "No. You're going to be Hawkeye and-"

"You two are stupid."

"Excuse me?" Iggy frowned at him then. "How-"

"If we're going to be the freaking Avengers, we're going to be the real freaking Avengers." It was Fang's turn to cross his arms. "There ain't no chick. I'm the Wasp, Gazzy can be the Hulk, you can be Iron Man, and Max can be Thor or Ant-Man. Maybe even Captain America. But there is no way-"

"Ant-Man?" I snickered, but they ignored me. Rude.

"What are you talking about, Fang?" Iggy crossed his arms. "I've never even heard of-"

"Then you don't deserve the right to-"

"Oh, whatever! I was only trying to be nice, including you two in something. You know, I don't even like the stupid Avengers. I just thought it'd be fun, you know, to dress up in some of the stuff down in the labs. Be cool. And I even was willing to pretend that I wanted to be the Avengers, since you like Marvel so much, when I really wanted to be the Just-"

"Do not-"

"Justice League, Fang! I wanted to be the Justice League!"

"The Justice League is nothing but-"

"Hello, Fang," Iggy growled at him then. "The Avengers was only created to rival the Justice League. It-"

"So what? So freaking what? What does that have to do with anything? We wouldn't have alcohol without water, but do I want water? Heck no!"

Ugh. Kill me. Drive a stake through my heart. Honestly.

"DC came first, Fang! It was founded in-"

"I don't care, Iggy. I really don't. I don't care about what came first. I care about what is better. I-"

"Oh, better? Think about this, idiot, if you want better. Everyone knows Batman and Superman, but who the heck knows anyone from-"

"Spiderman and Hulk. Cyclopes and Wolverine. Wolver-effing-rine, Ig-gy."

"Green Lantern. Green freaking Lantern. Wonder Woman. Catwoman."

"Are you serious? Black Cat is-"

"Black Cat isn't half of what-"

"Black Cat is everything!"

Gasman blinked. Then he looked at me. "I just wanted to dress up as a superhero."

"I know, baby. Just let them-"

"Like, what the heck does DC have other than Batman, Superman, and the Justice League anyhow?" Fang went on. "I mean seriously?"

"What does Marvel have?"

"Spiderman, X-Men, the Fantastic Four-"

"Oh, if you don't shut up about X-Men. You always want to talk about X-Men. X-Men is-"

"X-Men is God in the world of comics and you're just jealous. All DC fans are constantly jealous. You spend all this time trying to defame Marvel because you're jealous. You're freaking-"

"Oh, I'm jealous? Really? Of what? Huh? Of a bunch of mutants? Yeah, right. There's no story line. Just born with it? Yeah, okay. Bruce Wayne? Dead parents, rich heir? That is a storyline. A baby come from an alien planet? Super strength? That's-"

"That's bull and you know it. Superman and Batman don't even make sense."

"Yes, they do!"

"No they don't. Why the heck do people stay in Gotham and Metropolis if stuff happens constantly? It's a plot hole. A big-"

"It is not a plot hole! Why do people stay in Spiderman's town if-"

"Because it's freaking New York City, Iggy! Who would leave New York City? Huh? Huh?"

"Me if I'm going to be killed or be saved by some geeky, radioactive freak-"

"Oh, Spiderman's a freak now? Spiderman's a freak?"

"Yes! He is!"

"Good! Freaking good! I'm so glad that he's a freak, Iggy because that means he's a mutant. A mutant freak. Unlike that freaking alien Clark Kent. Like, ooh, he's not wearing his glasses. Now he's suddenly someone different. Amazing. Freaking Amazing."

"Shut up. You shut up."

"No, you shut up. We are either going to be the original Avengers, Earth's Mightiest Heroes, and we are going to like it!"

"No!"

"Fine. Then I'm not going as anything."

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

"…Really? It's over now?" I looked back and forth between Iggy and Fang who were just glaring at one another. When we were kids, one of the few things that Jeb allowed us to have were comic books. They were gross and smelled, so I never messed with them, but they were what he used to teach Iggy and Fang to read. Err, well, Fang, but he always read them aloud to Iggy. They took everything about them to heart.

The big babies.

"Well…" Iggy kicked at the ground then. "I think we should be the current Avengers. Like the ones that everyone knows."

"Why, Iggy? Huh? Why would I want to be-"

"Because, Fang, if we are, then Max gets to be Black Widow. And you can even be Hawkeye if you-"

"Hawkeye doesn't belong with Black Widow, Iggy. Mockingbird was way better for-"

"Are you forgetting something?"

"What?"

Iggy stared hard at him then. "What if I told you that I could acquire a wig?

"A wig?"

"For Max's costume."

"Um, Max would like a say in this stuff," I spoke up. "And do you really have all the stuff to make a costume? On an island? Iggy? Really?"

They ignored me. Again, rude.

"And?" Fang asked him with a frown. "Why would I-"

"What color is Black Widow's hair, Fang?"

He paused. "Originally-"

"Not originally. Think."

Then he grinned. Very big. "Okay. We're in."

"What?" I frowned, glancing back and forth between the two guys. They just shook hands before Fang led Iggy off with him, apparently going to finish discussing the details. Fang even left behind his food.

"Am I missing something?" I asked Gasman who only shrugged his shoulders slightly and scratched his head.

"I'm not sure."

"What color is that stupid spider's hair?"

He didn't even blink. "Red."

And it all made sense. Not even giving it a second thought, I ran after them.

"Fang!"

* * *

**I totally had to do this one-shot after pancakes-for-you told me that Maximum Ride is totally going to be done into a comic by Marvel. If you guys knew how excited I was, you'd be slightly freaked out. I'm more happy about this than I was about the three last books. Seriously. Marvel for freaking ever. Duh. **


End file.
